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Intimate Connections, by David D. Burns
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The Clinically proven program for making close friends and finding a loving partner.
- Sales Rank: #74737 in Books
- Brand: Burns, David D.
- Published on: 1985-11-05
- Released on: 1985-11-05
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 6.85" h x 1.02" w x 4.25" l, .60 pounds
- Binding: Mass Market Paperback
- 368 pages
About the Author
David D. Burns, M.D., a clinical psychiatrist, conveys his ideas with warmth, compassion, understanding, and humor unmatched by any other writer in the self-help field. His bestselling Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy has sold more than three million copies to date. In a recent national survey of mental health professionals, Feeling Good was rated number one from a list of more than one thousand as the most frequently recommended self-help book on depression. His Feeling Good Handbook was rated number two in the same survey.
Dr. Burns's entertaining teaching style has made him a popular lecturer for general audiences and mental health professionals throughout the country as well as a frequent guest on national radio and television programs. He has received numerous awards including the Distinguished Contribution to Psychology Through the Media Award from the Association of Applied and Preventive Psychology. A magna cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa graduate of Amherst College, Dr. Burns received his medical degree from the Stanford University School of Medicine. He is currently clinical associate professor of psychiatry at the Stanford University School of Medicine and is certified by the National Board of Psychiatry and Neurology.
Most helpful customer reviews
131 of 138 people found the following review helpful.
Excellent guide for overcoming loneliness
By Kate McMurry
David D. Burns, M.D., has been a Clinical Associate Professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Stanford University School of Medicine since 1995, the same school where he received his M.D. degree in the 1970's. From 1975 to 1995, Dr. Burns served on the clinical faculty of the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine and served as Acting Chief of Psychiatry at the Presbyterian Medical Center of the University of Pennsylvania Health System. He has also written: Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy; The Feeling Good Handbook; and Ten Days to Self-Esteem. He teaches workshops for the public and continuing-education seminars for mental health professionals. He was recently featured in a 90-minute nationally televised PBS program on depression entitled "Feeling Good"....
Though this book is primarily directed at single people struggling to find a compatible mate, I also found it very useful, even though I am happily married, for two major reasons: (a) Loneliness. Dr. Burns believes that loneliness is not a function of who you are with, or not with, but arises out of not treating yourself well and enjoying your own company. Thus, even people who are blessed with a wonderful mate can get lonely from time to time. Dr. Burns shows you how to head off loneliness at its source by building your self-esteem through the technique of treating yourself with care and respect. People who treat themselves badly not only feel badly about themselves, they get very needy. When you are needy, you tend to become very self-centered, and other people very naturally shy away from that. Who wants to be with someone who is clinging to you out of desperation rather than unselfish, generous interest and affection? (b) Distorted Thinking. Dr. Burns says that the way we interpret the actions of the people around us affects how happy or unhappy we are--and how successful we are in getting and keeping close relationships. He provides many simple, practical suggestions for changing negative, irrational thinking so that we can prevent depression, anxiety and general misery both inside ourselves and within our relationships.
I highly recommend this insightful, practical book to people in every type of relationship situation, whether unhappily alone, unhappily together, or happily together and wanting to keep it that way. Dr. Burns's advice can help fix or prevent any relationship problems you might have.
63 of 65 people found the following review helpful.
IF YOU'RE A SHY PERSON, YOU MUST READ THIS BOOK
By Mike S.
This book changed the way I thought about myself. I will never be the same again. There are so many helpful things in this book that I can't list them all, but what helped me the most was the realization that I am not a freak. Sounds simple, but I believed that I was, ever since high school. Now I know that I am completly normal, and life is full of possibilities. If you are afraid of people, think that your coworkers are thinking bad thoughts about you, can't even approach someone of the opposite sex, or are just shy, you need to get this book. You don't have to stay stuck where you are. Don't let life pass you by.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
The Love of My Life
By The name is Mill, John Stuart Mill
The most powerful and effective advice on loving yourself that I have ever read or heard anywhere.
His idea that really helped me gain a sense of self-reliability and self-love was that when you're already a fully formed adult, you actually don't need others' love in order to be happy or survive in life.
You only need one person to complete you, one person who will always have your back, who will always be there for you to love and comfort you.
That person must be you before all others.
His Pleasure Predicting worksheet helped me to see that I did indeed enjoy doing things by and with myself very much, and although it's nice to have a boyfriend or friends to hang out with, I am capable of giving myself the love, support, and entertainment I need.
Everyone else is a plus, and not a must (quote from Diane Von Furstenberg---not in this book, but very much in line with Dr. Burns' philosophy).
Ever since doing the exercises and learning that concept from Dr. Burns, I no longer feel lonely when by myself, and have learned to fully enjoy my own company when I need time to think and do things by myself.
This is one of the most precious gifts I've ever received: the ability to be my own best friend, and the love of my own life. I hope you'll receive it too :-)
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