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When Someone You Love is Kinky, by Dossie Easton, Catherine A. Liszt
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When Someone You Love Is Kinky to help "non-kinky" folks understand and communicate with their kinky friends, partners, and relatives. Included are guidelines for dealing with the emotional turmoil of the coming-out process; brief and non-threatening descriptions of the commonest kinks (and ideas about why people enjoy them); suggestions for how to talk to your kinky friend or relative in ways that promote good communication; explanation of how kinky people keep themselves safe while exploring diverse sexualities; a glossary of commonly used terminology from the kink communities; a resource guide to help the reader find further information and support.
- Sales Rank: #865344 in Books
- Brand: Greenery Press CA
- Published on: 2000-09-15
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.12" h x .44" w x 6.06" l, .61 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 156 pages
- Greenery Press CA
Most helpful customer reviews
13 of 13 people found the following review helpful.
good, but just not enough
By jthx
This would be a good book to give to my mom. Assuming my mom isn't a total pervert, which wouldn't surprise me in the least.
Sadly, what I *really* wanted from this book was more emphasis on romantic partners. That to me is kinda? what the title implies, and what I wanted to get out of reading it. I remember the confusion and scariness and "wtf am I even doing anyway" stuff that happened when my partner admitted to me that he was extremely kinky, and THAT was what I wanted this book to emphasize. It's mentioned in brief, and I appreciate that, but I wanted more on the "okay so my partner is kinky and I am willing to try being kinky also... now what? do I just go buy some leather pants?" question. That seems to be a pretty common problem, and one that existing literature frequently stinks at addressing. (Most "baby" BDSM literature is focused on "I have a kink, how can I act on it" rather than "my partner has a kink, how do I figure out how to incorporate that.")
I didn't really go for the "Dear ___" letters, either. At first because they were done as images and not pull-quotes, so in the Kindle version, they're very hard to read. Then, when I could actually read them, I just got annoyed. The person who got harassed at work for writing kinky emails to their Dominant on their work computer? I am sorry that happened. It sucks that your boss is a jerk. But why on earth were you writing (again) kinky emails to your Dominant on your work computer? That's... not really sympathy-inducing, at least to me, and it sure ain't helping with the idea that us kinksters are all-encompassing perverts who are incapable of NOT being perverts when it's neither necessary nor appropriate.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Good starting point, a little to mainstream for the issue in my opinion.
By Perry
I heard great things about this book and bought one for my friend who is coming out. Of course, I had to read it before I could give it to her for that purpose.
I found the round about way they approach some of the subjects bothersome. There are several areas that, as someone with extensive experience in these activities, I found evasive or poorly informed enough to consider not give the book.
If you are more than 50 shades style kinky, read this book before you give it to a loved one. Depending on how they read this, it may not actually help.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Great Book by great authors
By CellarDoor
I LOVE Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy's Topping and Bottoming books. That said, we loved this one also. I bought it for my boyfriend who is somewhat knowledgeable about the community already, but he enjoyed having everything spelled out in ink. We especially enjoyed the last two chapters regarding negotiating with your partner needs and desires, as well as being open about solutions.
These girls have been an invaluable tool in my relationship! Fantastic buy.
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